Ridley Scott's NAPOLEON: Read AFTER viewing

I have been a Ridley Scott fan ever since watching and re-watching The Duellists (1977) as a teenager. I still adore that film and regard it as one of the (if not THE) best portrayal of the Napoleonic era on film. I similarly enjoy Kingdom of Heaven, Gladiator, The Last Duel and even forgive the final fight scene in Scott's Robin Hood. So I have been anticipating the 2023 release of Napoleon with great anticipation.

I have been frustrated with the miserable cynics within our historical and wargaming communities who have shown themselves so determined to dislike a movie before they had even seen it. In forums I have observed a tiresome feeding frenzy of negativity and group-think which I ended up ignoring toward the end. It was clear some of us would not and could not ever be satisfied with anything anyone will ever produce.

How very disappointing it is that from my perspective, these profits of doom have been proven correct.

I attended the cinema on Friday just past with some of my best friends whom I had toured the battlefield of Waterloo with in 2012. We had gotten the band back together as it were and were well and truly prepared to be entertained and amazed by what Ridley and his team were about to reveal to us. In short, we all agreed than no matter what gloss we tried to put on it, it was simply a bad movie.

Taken as a whole, I feel it just didn't know what it was trying to say and so ended up a confused, uninteresting shambles. We did not get any real essence of who Napoleon was as a man or his impact on the world. His drive and ambition, his administrative energy and his military genius were absent from the screenplay and performance. His eloquence and charisma which he developed from an awkward youth were not at all in evidence.

Of all the great men in history I'd suggest we know more about Napoleon than almost anyone. He has been much written about during his own massively significant lifetime and since, including by his own hand. It's clear to me that Scott's Napoleon was not the passion project it needed to be and I wonder what he or scriptwriter David Scarpa knows of their subject at all.

I'm not going to criticize this movie for what it was not - a common habit. We get what we get and I find it a trifle absurd to suggest how they should have done this or that when I'm not a movie director.

Napoleon is not a war movie, it's not a love story, it fails to become any sort of drama and it's definitely extremely poor history. It's not even bad enough to make a twisted comedy. It's bland bordering on pointless.

I do have to remark on the battle sequences which were shamefully ridiculous - truly enough said. In a word, they were despicable. By the time of Waterloo, I had ceased to care what I was looking at which meant for me there was no climax - a real flaw in basic story-telling.

The Marshalate were all but absent except as a mute backdrop. The formative Italian campaigns were dismissed entirely and the Egyptian campaign reduced to a singular act of fictional vandalism and a curious encounter with a mummy. It seems to me that Ridley Scott is too old and tired to do what he once knew so well how to do - make compelling movies.

I could write volumes against this Napoleon movie but I'll spare us all. I know I do not want to see this movie again - possibly the most damning statement I can think of. The offering through this theatrical release has left me so disenchanted with the project that I can't imagine an extended director's cut could salvage it. I want no more of this if it's all the same. It's been a real let-down. So, is there anything to recommend it at all? A couple of things only I'm afraid.

I felt the costuming was superb. I also thought the stand out performance was Vanessa Kirby as Josephine. For me, she made the only impact from a generally miscast ensemble. Such a shame that her performance means little if it's trapped inside a lemon.

Mathematicians may calculate screen time and lines delivered by Phoenix against Rod Steiger's performance in Waterloo - I won't be. For my money, Steiger's depiction of the great man remains the peak of big screen performances and captures more of his essence in less screen time.

I still hope some good can come of this production. It's certainly not a move made for the likes of me but if it can generate more interest in the period and encourage better story tellers to do so, then I remain eager and hopeful for a brighter future. I understand it may have kicked Steven Spielberg's Kubric Napoleonic mini-series into top gear. If he can give us a Napoleon on par with his Lincoln movie, then we have something to look forward to.

If you can see this movie and like it better than me, I'm genuinely happy for you. I hope people can. This is why I hope you haven't read this before watching it and making up your own minds. If you end up agreeing with me, I'm sorry you wasted your time, hope and money as I have.